With just a week until I turn 30, I thought it would be the perfect time to answer The Up Series questions to round up my twenties. It is crazy to me that I will be turning 30 in exactly one week from now. My twenties have been a really fun and interesting decade of my life with a lot of healing, self growth, and joy. I still have a long way to go in life but I feel closer than ever to the person I want to be.

For The Up Series this year, I decided to try out some new questions that I found from Stephen Ango on Medium.

1. What did you do this year that you’d never done before?

I went parasailing and snorkeling! I was so scared to do both of them as they were new experiences but I thoroughly enjoyed both of them and can’t wait to do it again.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions?

No. I didn’t really set many resolutions at the start of 2021 as I was quite unmotivated and uninspired to do anything and felt very stagnated in my life.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Yes, my fourth godchild was born – Jasper!

4. Did anyone close to you die?

I am blessed to say no.

5. What cities/states/countries did you visit?

I visited Sydney in March 2021, Stanthorpe in the middle of 2021, and Tangalooma in November 2021.

6. What would you like to have next year that you lacked this year?

Romance!

7. What date(s) from this year will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

5 March 2021. It was the date that everything changed for me for the remainder of the year and my life. The day I felt like Sydney was truly home and I had to move back.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Starting to see a personal trainer and being consistent with it.

9. What was your biggest failure?

I didn’t have many failures this year, it was a lot of growth, expansion, and forward movement. I think I felt a lot of day-to-day boredom which was a fail as it’s up to me to change my attitude and make each day one to remember.

10. What other hardships did you face?

Just a lot of feeling stuck, and when I finally decided I’m going to move to Sydney it took a lot of courage to commit to the idea. I will be moving in just a few short weeks, right after I turn 30.

11. Did you suffer illness or injury?

I did. I had a sore neck for most of the year, but the most memorable was in September 2021 when I ended up in hospital 4 days after the Pfizer vaccine. The vaccine amplified the inflammation my body is already dealing with which lead to a gallbladder attack (acute cholecystitis) and a day in hospital. It was something completely unlike anything I’ve ever experienced and was so painful, uncomfortable, and draining. Before I had the second dose I took some supplements that helped, but now that it’s been triggered it will most likely happen again.

12. What was the best thing you bought?

I feel as though I didn’t buy many things in 2021 compared to previous years which is great, so I’m going to say my ETFs were the best purchase/investment!

13. Whose behaviour merited celebration?

N/A

14. Whose behaviour made you appalled?

Some of the Governments were out of control when it came to COVID-19 restrictions.

15. Where did most of your money go?

Apart from general living costs, I’m proud to say that for the first time it went to Savings/Investments.

16. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Reconnecting with an old friend out of the blue and also meeting someone I really had a great connection with.

17. What song will always remind you of this year?

Let’s Go Home Together by Ella Henderson and Tom Grennan. It was my most played song of 2021 by fat!

18. Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. Happier or sadder? Happier.

ii. Thinner or fatter? About the sane.

iii. Richer or poorer? Richer.

19. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Getting out of my comfort zone – every time I did I had so much fun and made the best memories of the year.

20. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Less complaining – it never leads to a favourable outcome.

21. How will you be spending Christmas?

Christmas just came and went and I spent it with my immediate family. I hope next year it is the same.

22. Did you fall in love this year?

Yes, although I don’t think anyone fell in love with me this year.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

No, I don’t have time or energy to hate anyone.

24. What was your favorite show?

Good Trouble. I also fell in love with One Tree Hill again thanks to the Drama Queens podcast!

25. What was the best book you read?

I haven’t read a full book in a very long time.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery of the year?

Dear Evan Hansen – I became obsessed with the soundtrack. Also Casey Lowry – he doesn’t have much music out, but I love his tiktoks.

27. What was your favourite film?

I only watched one movie at the cinema in the last year which was Dear Evan Hansen which I loved.

28. What was your favourite meal?

Lemon & herb chicken and potatoes.

29. What did you want and get?

I wanted direction and definitely got it along with the gift of courage to pursue it.

30. What did you want and not get?

The love of my life.

31. What did you do on your birthday?

My birthday is in a week! But last year’s birthday when I turned 29 I cried a lot, went to breakfast with my mum, and cried more. I was very depressed on my birthday, feeling directionless and like nothing had changed in the previous year.

32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Falling in love with someone who loves me too.

33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept of the year?

Midi dresses.

34. What kept you sane?

Podcasts.

35. Which celebrity/public figure did you admire the most?

I don’t really admire celebrities or public figures anymore, at least not the way I used to. I am a big fan of Mindy Kaling though as she creates such wonderful and fun tv shows for me to watch!

36. What political issue stirred you the most?

COVID-19, like it did for anyone.

37. Who did you miss?

My brother. After 3 years of not seeing him we finally got to reunite a couple of weeks ago for Christmas.

38. Who was the best new person you met?

That has to be a secret…

39. What valuable life lesson did you learn this year?

How important my health is and how much I have disregarded it over the year and abused my body. My body is strong and has been able to fight me back but after ending up in hospital from the COVID vaccination that caused a gallbladder attack, I realised how fragile my body actually is and that I need to take better care of it.

40. What is a quote that sums up your year?

Expect the unexpected!

As I near the end of my life as a 27 year old, I wanted to capture my thoughts & feelings of this time. I honestly feel as though the last 6 years have flown by and I don’t know what’s going on. I’m aware time is an illusion, but it’s also something so essential to our lives. I love having markers of time that allow us to separate different seasons of our lives.

1. What is your greatest ambition? 

To fall in love and have 3 beautiful children who love life, are brave, courageous, smart, creative, kind and who love God. I don’t want them to live in fear or be too cautious like I am.

2. What is your greatest accomplishment? 

Raising myself and continuing to grow as an individual without a lot of help from others, while also trying to let people in and help me. My greatest accomplishment this year has been the deepening of my relationship with God and my knowledge of Him.

3. What is the greatest struggle in your life right now? 

My life is pretty easy compared to most, and I am pretty happy most days but I struggled with finding time for myself this year as I was very social.

4. What is your current goal? 

This time last year my goal was to find a partner to share my life with, but now it is to be healthier and fitter, buy a house and get a dog! I’ve built all of my 2020 goals around this main dream. I think it’ll come true in about 3 years so I need to work hard to save money for it. I was blessed to get an inheritance this year but I still need to work hard to make up the rest of the money needed.

5. What do you fear?

A lot less than I used to. I still fear snakes, needles, spiders like I used to, but I fear embarrassment and speaking to new people for the first time less than I used to. My biggest fear is still not being able to have children.

6. What do you eat regularly?

My diet has changed in the past few weeks as I am trying to eat healthier. This year I ate a lot of McDonalds and other takeaways, soft drink, and a lot of chicken based meals and a lot of sugar-heavy items. I have cut back on those recently and started drinking more water, eating more fruit + vegetables, soup and nuts.

7. What do you believe in spiritually?

I believe in the Holy Trinity – God, Jesus, and The Holy Spirit. Jesus died on the cross to pay the price for our past, present and future sin, to set us free from our ego and to show us a better way forward.

I also believe in reincarnation and past lives, karma, energy, auras, psychics, mediums.

You have to have discernment, wisdom and use good judgement as not everyone is authentic or has your best & highest good in mind.

The Devil (or concept of The Devil) is everywhere and is very deceptive so you need to be alert and make sure you don’t get led astray.

8. What do you do with your time?

I am quite busy these days. I go to work Mon-Fri, go to church, life group, see friends, create. I watch a lot of YouTube and spend a lot of time on social media like a lot of people but am trying to get better with that.

9. Which people in your life are the closest to you?

In past years I have felt very close to certain friends or family members, but I feel distance from them now. The people that I spend the most time with are the church community, however I am still not sure I feel the closest to them. I think I have learned that a healthy distance is imperative when it comes to relationships and there is such a thing as “too close”.

To answer the question I think everyone is at the same level of closeness now.

10. How do you feel about the opposite sex?

Oh gosh…….

Well, for the first time in a long time, I had a crush this year, and it drove me crazy! I know they say love is supposed to drive you nuts, but after stepping back from it recently, I realised that it’s not healthy to be consumed or overtaken with someone else. You need to keep a sense of independence and individuality and continue to pursue your passions and hobbies even when someone else has a lot of your time and attention. Desperation isn’t attractive and neither are unrequited feelings.

Men are also more sensitive, intelligent, helpful, kind and caring than I have been giving them credit for the last few years. They struggle with the exact same things we do, they just don’t usually have the support system to express their thoughts and feelings. I was able to spend time with more males than I have since high school this year and getting to know them has been a blessing.

11. What has been the biggest challenge this year? 

My health. I have always been very blessed health-wise but this year as Virgo was all over my astrological chart, I decided to tackle a few health things that I’d been ignoring for awhile. I got my first ever blood test and the results came back that I was very deficient in the B-12 vitamin and needed 3 shots (1 per week for 3 weeks) to get it to a normal level. In between the 2nd and 3rd shot I started breaking out in really bad acne on my face, which spread to my chest and lower back. My face felt like crocodile skin for 3 weeks but finally went down, as my chest got worse and spread to my lower back. I’ve been very lucky with acne over the years and have only had a few pimples every now and then, but usually my skin is very clear so it made me quite self conscious considering the ones on my chest were unable to be covered up by most clothing. They are still there but have gone down a lot.

I also got my period back early this year after almost a decade of not having a regular period. As I started to have romantic feelings for someone my cycle came back and thankfully hasn’t left since those feelings went away. I think being so closed off to men and relationships emotionally affected my cycle and once I opened that door again my hormones kind of fell back into how they should be.

Overall my mental health was good but I decided to start seeing a psychologist again to deal with some of my anxiety issues and to grow in areas that I have no experience in. It has been such a help and I’m so grateful to my psychologist who understands me. She recommended I do the Gallup StrengthsFinder test and my top five were Empathy, Connectedness, Futuristic, Relator & Discipline which described me perfectly.

In the last few weeks of being 27 I got a lot of back pain and tried seeing a chiropractor and an acupuncturist for the first time. I wasn’t a fan of the chiropractor but the acupuncturist was a very positive experience.

12. What is success to you? 

Success is living life, thriving; not just surviving. Making changes, seeking God, building a community of friends, family, and believers who will support you and keep you on your path. Self-growth. Improving health and habits and building generosity and wealth. Accepting where you are and finding joy in whichever season of life you are in. Cultivating a life you love. If that is how I define it, then I am successful.

13. What were your highlights this year? 

• Going to Sugar Republic
• Trip to Sydney & Melbourne and seeing LANY and The Lumineers while there
• Getting a new car
• My cousin moved in with me
• Weddings!! This was the first year any friends of mine got married
• Kids Church Christmas Party
• My Mum’s Birthday – my brother flew up from Melbourne and we surprised her at dinner which was pretty epic
• Work Christmas Party
• Church Christmas Production
• Photoshoot with my friends

I think that’s it for this edition of The Up Series. Click here for the 24 year old edition. I’ll see you next January when I’m 28!

This year I stumbled across The Up Series. It is a series of documentaries where they asked fourteen people from around various areas in the UK questions about their lives every seven years. I thought it would be an interesting thing for me to do, although I would like to do this series every year, instead of every seven years. I’m very into documenting my life and would love to see how my attitude and life circumstances change from year to year. I’m hoping next year that I will be able to create my own video documentary for this project but for now my One Second Every Day videos will have to do.

1. What is your greatest ambition? 
My greatest ambition is to be a mother. I don’t see this answer ever changing. Ever since I was a little girl I have been infatuated with children, and have always pictured myself having kids. I’ve been pretty consistent with my vision of the future for the last couple of years. I used to want a girl and a boy – just like what my mum had so my kids would have the same dynamic and my brother and I. My vision now involves twin boys and a little girl – I have all of their names planned out and don’t share them with anyone except my mum and brother because I fear someone else will have a baby before me and use one of the names. I want my little girl to be called Hope, which I have tattooed on my left wrist, but the boys named remain a secret for now.

2. What is your greatest accomplishment? 
My greatest accomplishment to date is overcoming my depression. I first became depressed after my dad died in 2000 when I was 8 years old, and it took until the end of 2014 when I realised that the year and a half I had spent in therapy had actually worked. It cured me and I was confused about who I was when I was no longer depressed. The world opened up to me, or rather I opened up to the world. Overcoming depression allowed me to be a more confident, talkative, open, and honest person. I was able to let go of a lot of fear and shame that has been holding me back ever since he died.

3. What is the greatest struggle in your life right now? 
My greatest struggle right now is realising that I have a lot more power than I utilise. I’m scared to achieve, I’m scared to be great. I’m scared to have everything I’ve ever wanted, because I worry that it might not be enough and it won’t bring me the happiness I’ve always thought it would.

4. What is your current goal? 
I have two goals right now. One is to drive more so I can get my hours up so I can be a P Plater. The other is to lose weight. I really have nothing standing in my way anymore, except for my bad habits. My eating and exercise habits really need to change so my health can change for the better.

5. What do you fear?
This is something I rarely talk about because the idea of it is so painful, but the thing I fear most is infertility. Like I’ve mentioned all I’ve ever wanted was to be a mum and my biggest fear is that I won’t be able to be one. I know that I will be one no matter what, whether it means I have to consider surrogacy or adoption, but I want to experience carrying a child and giving birth to my own flesh and blood.

6. What do you think of love & what/who do you love?
Love is a concept. I’ve not experienced love and I’ve not felt loved before. I fear that I will never know how to be in a romantic relationship because I am so stunted in this area. Love requires compromise and sacrifice, and I’m not sure I’m willing to do those things. I think most people don’t know what love is, which is why life is so messy.

I love my cameras, vinyl records and tarot & oracle card collection. I love the vision of the future that lives in my head.

7. What do you believe in spiritually?
Honestly whenever somebody asks this I refer them to the television show Charmed. Everything that television show showcases, I believe in. My spiritual practice currently involves a lot of tarot and oracle cards as well as a lot of talking to my Dad, spirit guides and the Angels. I have also recently gotten into guided meditations, though I am not great at switching off yet.

Apart from that I believe in feminism, LGBTQ+ rights, and I believe that the world has a lot of work to do to improve things.

8. What do you do with your time?
Right now I am coming out of a period of nearly 7 months of unemployment. Well, I had a part time job but I worked from home so I have been very introverted and physically, emotionally and mentally inactive. I have spent a lot of time browsing the internet over this period of time and working on my spirituality. I’m hoping that this time next year I spend much less time online and am a more physically active person with some more friends. We’ll see…

9. Which people in your life are the closest to you?
My mum and Tom (my brother), and my friends Janice and Sarah. I have other people I talk to and am friends with, but these are the people I speak to nearly every day. Even so, I don’t have the level of closeness I desire with any of those people. I crave depth of connection so strongly that even my closest friends and family members don’t even come close to satisfying that desire.

10. How do you feel about the opposite sex?
I’ve been infatuated with boys ever since I can remember. It started with platonic love for my dad, brother and grandfather, then I moved on to having romantic interests in boys in primary school.

These days the opposite sex scares me, and I’m not sure I know why. Maybe it’s because of the content I see online – there are scary stories and terrifying things that you see, hear and read on a daily basis, and there’s always something that a male can say that will offend me as a woman. It might not make a lot of people happy to read this as us millennials are supposed to be all about ~equality~, but I do think females are the superior sex.

11. What is success to you? 
Living the life you needed to and learning mistakes. Being at peace with how things panned out when you’re on your deathbed. I wouldn’t be happy with my life if I never had kids or experienced being in love, so if I am able to experience those things that would mean my life was a success.

This was written half way through 2016 to give a more accurate view of what things were like at 24. I turn 25 in a few weeks so I will see you in a year. Please let me know if you do anything like this, I think it would be fun to see how we all change from year to year.